


Too Late

by God_Chester



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Emotionally Repressed Dean, F/M, Hurt No Comfort, Jealousy, M/M, but also meg??, cas highkey loves dean, dean lowkey loves cas, mostly platonic destiel, pinning Castiel, side megstiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-15
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2018-09-17 14:10:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9328277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/God_Chester/pseuds/God_Chester
Summary: Dean had always hated the mere thought of having a soulmate. Something about the universe deciding who you were "destined to be with" aggravated him to the point of pretending he didn't have a soulmate, even when all the signs pointed to him having one. His name was Castiel and he was in his homeroom class, and he was NOT Dean's soulmate. Castiel was nothing more than a classmate, maybe even a friend, but whatever they were, Dean wasn't going to let the universe change that.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Wow. My first story. Heh, I guess that's something to celebrate. Yeah I know, stupid title and all but I couldn't think of anything else.
> 
> Anyway, please comment any thoughts, constructive criticism, or any mistakes you found while reading! This was not beta read so there's a high chance there are going to be mistakes. I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!

To many, finding their soulmate was the best - or at least one of the best - moments of their lives. A soulmate was someone destined to be the perfect match for you, someone who matched with you so perfectly. It was rare that anyone who had found their soulmate didn't last the rest of their lives with them, even rarer for someone to not have a soulmate, and almost impossible for someone's soulmate to not be theirs.

If Dean was to chose any of the above situations he easily would have chosen the "doesn't have a soulmate" one. Dean had always hated how the world seemed to chose who fit with you the best, not letting you have a say with who you are destined to be together with. He thought it was a load of bullshit. So when he found himself experiencing all the signs of having met his soulmate, he ignored them, instead favouring to continue telling people he had no soulmate.

It was difficult at first. Learning to ignore the part inside of him that yearned to get to know his soulmate - this Castiel dude - better. They were classmates after all, so Castiel wouldn't suspect a thing if Dean started trying to talk to him all of a sudden. Dean eliminated the idea as soon as it popped into his head though, having convinced himself he didn't _need_ nor _want_ a soulmate.

It wasn't until three months after Dean discovered his soulbond with Castiel did he realize that his life was never going to go back to normal. Soulmates weren't the stereotypical "perfect match" or anything truly. In reality, a soulmate was the person who was "cursed" - as Dean liked to call it - to be forced to slowly begin to sense any strong emotions you felt, and even your thoughts as the bond progressed. When you meet your soulmate you would immediately know it, for the fluttery feeling in your heart was mistaken by nothing else.

Dean should have known Castiel would have known what the feeling was the second he felt it. He should have known Castiel wasn't going to let him pretend he didn't feel the same thing. He should have known everything that had happened was going to, but somehow he didn't. Dean was for once in his lifetime, scared of what was coming next.

Dean should have understood that not everyone is like him and doesn't _want_ a soulmate. Dean should have noticed the looks Castiel sent him in class, or the attempts at starting up a conversation with him when class finished or when the teacher turned his back. Dean should have noticed a lot of things because then maybe life wouldn't have ended up like this, with him sitting on the curb of the street outside of his "soulmates" wedding.

It was never supposed to end up like this. Dean had never wanted for this to happen, for him to be crying his heart out over the bond he no longer felt because of a simple mistake he made when he was sixteen. If Dean had known pushing Castiel away when he realized their bond would have ended up with Castiel eventually marrying another woman over him, _his soulmate_ , he would have changed it in a heartbeat.

It was too late for regrets though. It had been eight years since Dean first discovered their bond, six since Castiel stopped trying to make any attempts to get him to admit their soulbond, five since they became best friends, four since Castiel had begun crushing on Meg - a girl at their uni, two since Castiel had finally gathered up the courage to ask Meg out, and one month since Castiel has proposed.

Dean could have said something, _anything_ , during those long years but he chose not to. He chose instead to stand by and watch as the one he denied all love for, slowly began to fall for another. He waited throughout all the heartbreak and nights spent crying in his room because he had convinced himself he didn't need a soulmate but maybe he was wrong. Maybe he needed Castiel, maybe he needed him because he was selfish or maybe he need him because he loved him, he would never know because he now knew Castiel no longer needed him.

Castiel had Meg now and no matter how much he tried to convince himself that it didn't hurt, it did. It hurt so badly. If his parents had ever told him that this is what a broken soulbond felt like Dean would have never tried pushing Castiel away all those years ago. It felt like his heart was being ripped out of his chest and he knew the pain would never end. A broken soulbond was something that stayed with you for the rest of your life, it would always be there, just less painful than it originally was.

Sitting on that curb outside the house, listening to the loud music and laughter come from the wedding had never felt so horribly disgusting to Dean. He didn't know how he had made it through the entire night, watching as Castiel and Meg said their vows with tears in theirs eyes as they felt it, as they felt the bond that Dean no longer felt, as they felt the love that maybe they should have been born to feel together instead of it being wasted on someone who never wanted it to begin with. 

Dean didn't think he had ever cried so much as he did that night, especially when Castiel came out looking for him since he was worried where his best friend went, because that was it. Dean would always just be his "best friend" to him now, nothing less or nothing more because of his fucking mistake.

Dean told him everything that night because maybe he was a little selfish, or maybe because he couldn't handle watching as Castiel loved someone else without knowing the full story, but he just did. He told Castiel about everything. The days he would cry himself to sleep because Castiel almost found out he was lying about the bond, the days his parents would question him about why he hadn't found his soulmate yet,  the times when he just wanted to scream to Castiel that it was him - that he was his soulmate - but he never did.

If Dean had thought the pain of the broken soulbond was horrible there was no way to describe the pain of what came next. The sad smile on Castiel's face as a single tear slowly began it's descent down his face as he whispered the simple two words, "I know."

Castiel had known the entire time. He had known about Dean lying about the soulbond because there was no way of not knowing, the feeling was unmistakable. Castiel had known the entire time that Dean was his soulmate, but had just let it happen because maybe deep down he knew Dean didn't want it or maybe that _he_ didn't want it. Maybe it was because of how much he cared that he let go, how dearly he cared for Dean that he was willing to give up his own happiness in order to give Dean what he had always wanted - no soulmate.

Dean couldn't stop the words from tumbling from his lips even though he knew it was the worst time to say them, the simple three words he should have said a long time ago, "I love you."

The broken sob he got in return was enough of an answer for Dean, he knew Castiel never stopped loving him. Dean knew deep down that this was all for him because Dean never wanted a soulmate or a soulbond, but maybe he wanted a lover, maybe he wanted someone to care for, not because they were forced because of a stupid bond.

There were too many maybe's but there was one thing for certain, Castiel no longer need him because he had Meg now. No matter how much Castiel loved Dean both of them knew he would never give up his life with Meg for the boy who had broken his first soulbond. Their story was over before it began.


End file.
